2015 - Poems I'll never Get to Say

Joyce

[Written March 2015]

I am so sorry but I cannot write about you

because it would be sad

the words would wrap themselves around my pen

and choke me

making it too difficult to write, to breathe

tears would pool on the paper

making the ink run, ruining your page

I’m supposed to be stronger — like you

I think I can be

so long as I don’t write about you

as long as I don’t call it a poem

as long as your name is not the title

then I’ll be just fine

then I can pretend

---

For Sam Simpson, My Grandfather

[Written February 23, 2015; Abridged]

I can’t even find the words

to write this poem

It'll have to write itself

Because nothing I can write

No word nor meter

No rhyme nor metaphor

Can do enough justice, enough love,

enough heartfelt respect for….

For Dr. Sam Simpson

I cannot — or shall not write about his life

Because my 18 years just can’t encompass his 83

Not all at once

So, I decided to write about my life

He called me “Sporty Girl” and "Writer"

Never once did I ever hear him say my name

But that was his way, as many of you know

You were all his “charmer” and his “friend” and his “child”

And he would call every person that

and make you feel like you truly were

But I… I was his Sporty Girl

And his Writer

And I would have written the dictionary forward and back

From A to Z, if he would have asked that of me

God’s gift to me

And to you

But well, I...

I was his Sporty Girl

And his Writer

And I was special

We were all special

But he was my...

Well, he was mine

My Pastor, and my grandfather, and my source

To find wisdom, to find God

And though I cannot find the words

I will lose myself in them

And I will write him

Because I was his Sporty Girl and his Writer

And I will search for the words until the end of eternity